Major Wasserman’s

Life Skills for Students

Common Student Bloopers – Don’t Make These Mistakes:

1.      “Can I borrow a pen/pencil/piece of paper?” – No.  You were not raised by wolves in the wilderness.  You’ve been in school for most of your life.  You know to bring pens, pencils, and paper to school EVERY day – even the first day of school.  If you don’t, then mooch supplies from your friends BEFORE you step foot in my classroom.  Think of it this way – how long do you think a teacher would keep her job if she went around asking to borrow other teacher’s lesson plans?

2.      “I wasn’t listening.”  -- This is NOT the teacher’s problem.  Not listening to what an instructor says means you were not paying attention – NOT a good thing to do or to admit.  If you missed something because YOU were zoning out, DON’T interrupt the class to catch up.  Stay after class to make arrangements w/the teacher to go over what you missed (and apologize for being inattentive).

3.      “I had to stay up all night to finish this project/assignment!” – I don’t know any teacher, including myself, who gives students only one night to finish a major assignment.  If you tend to put off assignments until the last minute, that is YOUR choice and not one to be celebrated or announced.  It might be a good thing to start learning how to budget your time so you don’t end up pulling all-nighters in the future.  Procrastination is not something you should be bragging about or even mentioning in front of your teacher.   A statement like this implies a gross disrespect for the instructor and the assignment, because you’re basically saying that you didn’t think it was important enough to devote quality time to.

4.      “This is so boring.” – So is filling out my income tax form.  But if I don’t do it, or don’t do it accurately, I could end up paying big bucks in fines to the IRS.  Being a citizen of this great country means bearing some burdens.  One of those is paying taxes.  Another is taking advantage of the phenomenal educational opportunities given to ALL young people in this country.  Your duty as an American is to learn as much as you can about everything you can, so you can help lead this nation into the 21^st century.  And, let’s face it, whining about how boring a subject is will only tick off the teacher – NOT a smart success strategy.

5.      “At least I did it/turned something in/showed up!” – Think about life in the real world for a minute.  One day, (unless you win the Powerball lottery), you’ll need a job to put food on your table, keep a roof over your head, and clothes on your back.  Imagine this:  you show up for work, and then do practically nothing.  You let the burgers burn, or you operate on a patient without putting him under anesthesia.  You do a lousy job.  You screw up.  Would you try to justify your lousy performance by telling your boss, “Well, at least I showed up.”?  Not unless you’re really into career suicide.  So here’s a word of advice – DON’T try this on a teacher, either.

6.      “I was absent yesterday.  Did I miss anything?” – The short answer is yes, you did.  But all teachers have routines for addressing the needs of students who’ve been absent.  Find out what your teacher’s method is, and follow it.  If you’re really smart, you’ll pick a study buddy in the class, so you can get any lecture notes you missed.

7.      “This is so unfair.” – It sure is.  It’s even more unfair that I wasn’t born Queen of the Nine Universes or with a face like Angelina Jolie’s.  Get used to it.  (I’ve had to.)